Never before has the world seen such a princess.
Nor have her own subjects, for that matter. But Genovian politics are nothing next to Mia's real troubles. Between a canceled date with her long-sought-after royal consort, a second semester of dreaded Algebra, more princess lessons from Grandmeacute;re, and the inability to stop gnawing on her fingernails, isn't there anything Mia is good at besides inheriting an unwanted royal title
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March 25, 2003
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Excerpt from The Princess Diaries, Volume IV: Princess in Waiting by Meg Cabot
MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS BY PRINCESS AMELIA MIGNONETTE GRIMALDI THERMOPOLIS RENALDO, AGE 14 YEARS AND 8 MONTHS
I will stop biting my fingernails, including the fake ones.
I will stop lying. Grandm ' re knows when I am lying anyway, thanks to my traitorous nostrils, which flare every time I tell a fib, so it's not like there is even a point in trying to be less than truthful.
I will never veer from prepared script while delivering televised address to the Genovian public.
I will stop accidentally saying m ' rde in front of the ladies-in-waiting.
I will stop asking Fran ' ois, my Genovian bodyguard, to teach me French swear words.
I will apologize to the Genovian Olive Growers Association for that thing with the pits.
I will apologize to the Royal Chef for slipping Grandm ' re's dog that slice of foie gras (even though I have told the palace kitchen repeatedly that I do not eat liver).
I will stop lecturing the Royal Genovian Press Corps on the evils of smoking. If they all wish to develop lung cancer, that is their prerogative.
I will achieve self-actualization.
I will stop thinking so much about Michael Moscovitz.
Oh, wait. It's okay for me to think about Michael Moscovitz, BECAUSE HE IS MY BOYFRIEND NOW!!!!!!!!
MT + MM = TRUE LOVE 4-EVER
Friday, January 2, 2 p.m., Royal Genovian Parliament
You know, I am supposed to be on vacation. Seriously. I mean, this is my winter break. I am supposed to be having fun, mentally recharging for the coming semester, which is not going to be easy, as I will be moving on to Algebra II, not to mention Health and Safety class. Everybody at school was all, Oh, you are so lucky, you get to spend Christmas in a castle being waited on hand and foot.
Well, first of all, there is nothing so great about living in a castle. Because guess what Castles are totally old. And yeah, it's not like this one was built in 4 A.D., or whenever it was my ancestress Princess Rosagunde first became ruler of Genovia. But it was still built in, like, the 1600s, and let me tell you what they didn't have in the 1600s:
Which is not to say there isn't a satellite dish now, but, hello, this is my dad's place; the only channels he has got programmed are, like, CNN, CNN Financial News, and the golf channel. Where is MTV 2, I ask you Where is the Lifetime Movie Channel for Women