Kids want more of Kenn Nesbitt's sidesplitting poetry. They can't get enough of his clever wordplay, wonderful imagery, and zany rhymes.
In this brand-new collection, Kenn has totally made up over fifty poems involving Acrobatic Cats, Kung Fu Pets, and Chickens on Computers.
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April 01, 2010
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Excerpt from Tighty Whitey Spider by Kenn Nesbitt
My Kitten Won't stop Talking
My kitten won't stop talking.
She just prattles night and day.
She walks around repeating
nearly everything I say.
My kitten never says, "Meow."
She never even purrs.
She mimics me instead
in that annoying voice of hers.
She waits for me to speak,
and then she copies every word,
or begs me for a cracker,
or says, "I'm a pretty bird."
I'm not sure what to do, and so
I simply grin and bear it.
She's been this way since yesterday;
that's when she ate my parrot.
My Kiwi Is the Captain
My kiwi is the captain of a supersonic plane
that doesn't fly to Switzerland or Singapore or Spain.
It doesn't fly to Jordan or Jamaica or Japan,
or Serbia, Somalia, Samoa, or Sudan.
It doesn't fly to Norway, Nicaragua, or Nepal.
It's safe to say it doesn't fly to anywhere at all.
But that's the way it always goes for kiwis, as you've heard.
It's true that he's a pilot, but he's still a flightless bird.
I Have to Write a Poem
I have to write a poem,
but I really don't know how.
So maybe I'll just make a rhyme
with something dumb like "cow."
Okay, I'll write about a cow,
but that's so commonplace.
I think I'll have to make her be...
a cow from outer space!
My cow will need a helmet
and a space suit and a ship.
Of course, she'll keep a blaster
in the holster on her hip.
She'll hurtle through the galaxy
on meteoric flights
to battle monkey aliens
in huge karate fights.
She'll duel with laser sabers
while avoiding lava spray
to vanquish evil emperors
and always save the day.
I hope the teacher likes my tale,
"Amazing Astro Cow."
Yes, that's the poem I will write
as soon as I learn how.