Love, Sex, and Happily Ever After : Preparing for a Marriage That Goes the Distance
What do you do if you want a marriage that doesn't just survive, but thrives? That doesn't just begin romantically but ends magnificently?
Answer: You do something different.
You've seen marriages fail time and again. Even relationships you thought were bulletproof don't last-or maybe worse--fade away to a cold, gray lovelessness. It's no wonder that for today's generation, "getting what you want" is often a substitute for love, and disillusionment about marriage is the new normal.
But you can have a long-term, love-blessed marriage. Whether you're still considering it, are about to be wed, or have been married for a while and want to make changes, Love, Sex & Happily Ever After delivers an infusion of hope. Author Craig Groeschel clearly and honestly lays out the choices and commitments you can make now to change the way you think and act--to build the relationship you want for the rest of your life.
With an invigorating mix of personal story, practical guidance and biblical truth, Craig invites you into a candid conversation about first dates, sex, communication, integrity, forgiveness, and commitment. Along the way, he shows how you can build a soul-enriching, God-honoring relationship with the one you love...and believe together again in your very own "happily ever after."
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August 16, 2011
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Excerpt from Love, Sex, and Happily Ever After by Craig Groeschel
Designed to Go All the Way
Is she the one? Four words that shaped my hope. My wish. My prayer.
Her name was Kelli. She was more beautiful than words could describe. Her tan was perfectly golden. Her blond hair could've starred in any shampoo commercial. Her smile stopped me in my tracks. And her legs... I'll just say, praise God for legs!
Kelli was wildly popular, completely feminine, yet also athletic. Confident, yet humble. Exciting, yet pure. Every guy I knew liked her.
I loved her.
Kelli dominated my thought life. Will she go out with me? Go with me? MARRY ME? Have my children? Live with me in a house with a white picket fence? You know, for our dog. Not a chick dog, like a Shih Tzu. A real dog. Maybe a black Lab. Or a German shepherd. Named Joe...
In my daydreams I was always the hero, rescuing Kelli from attackers using my finely honed nun-chucks skills. I protected her while stranded on a desert island. I kept her warm during a dangerous blizzard. All my fantasies ended the same: Kelli fell in love with me, then kissed me until I couldn't breathe. It was our destiny to be together. Forever. (Can you hear a Luther Vandross love song playing softly?)
Maybe my imagination was getting ahead of me. After all, she'd never spoken to me. She didn't even know my name. And, well, we were both in seventh grade. But trifling details couldn't weaken her magnetic pull. My life orbited around her. The mounting pressure seemed too much for my heart to bear.
Could she be "the one"?
ON THE WAY TO ONE
You're probably not in the seventh grade (and glad you never have to return to junior high hell again). But that longing for the one is virtually universal. You've yearned for the one to be part of your life-your soul mate, bound by passionate affection and a forever vow.
Does a fulfilling, lifelong commitment exist in your future? You hope so, but maybe you're not sure. When someone cute moves to your school or starts a new job at your office, you wonder, Could this be the one?
Or maybe you're already in love with someone. At this moment all the love songs on the radio make sense. You spend hours in the Hallmark store choosing the perfect card for your honey-pie-love-bunches. (You leave with eleven cards and a stuffed walrus.) For you the question isn't in the back of your mind; it's front and center, and you believe you know the answer. I think there's a one for me after all!
But perhaps you're on the other side of the relationship divide, and you're not so optimistic at the moment. You're recovering from a painful breakup. Disillusioned. You were sure you'd met the one. But that was before the lying. Before the drifting apart. Before the restraining order. Before the dude like Jim Carrey's character in The Cable Guy.
Maybe you were married. With all your heart, you believed it was forever, but it simply wasn't true. Whether it was divorce or a breakup, you feel alone. You ache, wondering when the pain will ease, if you'll ever love again. Were you even meant to find the one? Does wanting it to be true make it true?
I don't blame you. I've felt the same way. Slightly optimistic one moment, devastatingly depressed and hopeless the next. I always hated the person with all the answers. You know, the married friend who preaches, "You just have to not care. Then you'll find the one." Or "If you just surrender, the perfect person will show up."