Why Men Don't Have a Clue and Women Always Need More Shoes : The Ultimate Guide to the Opposite Sex
Do you know the top seven things men do that drive women nuts Or the real reason women cry more than men do What are men really looking for in a woman-both at first sight and for the long-term These are only the starting points for Barbara and Allan Pease as they discuss the very real-and often very funny-differences between the sexes.
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December 31, 2003
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Excerpt from Why Men Don't Have a Clue and Women Always Need More Shoes by Barbara Pease
When someone just won't let up
Nag: verb to annoy, badger, bend someone's ear, berate, breathe down someone's neck, worry, harrass, hassle, henpeck, pester, plague, provoke, scold, torment; noun a person, especially a woman, who nags
Nagging is a term used almost exclusively by men to describe women.
Most women deny they nag. They see themselves as reminding the males in their lives to do the things that must be done: household chores, taking their medication, fixing broken things and picking up their mess. Some nagging is considered constructive. Where would many men be without a woman in their lives cajoling them not to drink too much beer and eat too much fast food and, if they can't stop, to make sure they exercise and take regular cholesterol tests Nagging might even, at certain times, keep them alive.
If men nag, however, that's viewed very differently by society. Men are not naggers. They're assertive, they're leaders, and invariably they're passing on their wisdom--and gently reminding women of the path to take if they happen to forget along the way. Sure, they criticize, find fault, moan and complain, but it's always for the woman's benefit. The repetition of their advice, like "Read the map before you set off! How many times must I tell you " and "Can't you make more of an effort with how you look when my friends come round " shows admirable persistence and, above all, shows that they care.
Women, similarly, feel that nagging shows that they care, but men rarely see it in the same light. A woman will chide a man about throwing wet towels on the bed, peeling off his socks and leaving them all around the house, and not remembering to take out the garbage. She knows she's being irritating, but believes the way to get through to a man is by repeating, over and over, the same instructions until they one day, hopefully, sink in. She feels the things she's complaining about are based on truth so, while she knows she's being annoying, she feels justified in continuing. A woman's female friends won't see her as nagging either--they'll see the man as lazy or hard to handle and feel nothing but sympathy for his long-suffering partner.